So, I'm sure everyone has had a comment or an insult thrown at them, I know I have.
Why should people be able to define someone in one negative word and change or control their feelings? By letting them get to you isn't that a form of them having power?
The odd insults like "You're ugly" or "You are so fat, omg." "You're so self centered." are often said about someone who isn't seen as the model type that you see on Vogue or Heat. People who aren't the same as you aren't 'weird.'
Everyone is unique and original, inside and out. However some take longer to realize that and find a need to put others in the categories.
So when you get an insult what do you do? Do you:
1. Save it in a small jar to look at on a rainy day.
2. Take the 'thought' into consideration and change yourself to please everyone else.
3. Just ignore it.
If you picked one - sometimes I do this, not going to lie. - you are letting them have control of what you feel and knocking your confidence down one piece at a time. They shouldn't be the one to judge you and define you. It may sound more difficult but sometimes it's a matter of looking at them and thinking "Why should they be the one to insult me, are they perfect?" I would doubt it if they are commenting on you.
If you picked two you may want to go back to basics. Look at your life and what you enjoy most. Don't follow the crowed if you're fed up with it, do things that you like and have independence. You're beautiful no matter what anyone says and you should never feel the need to change for someone, ever.
Picking three would appear the best option, I certainly would agree. Battling the people's comments by ignoring them shows you are mature and you know that you are yourself, that's all you should be. - unless you are an actor.
Self confidence is one of my biggest issues. I'm always looking at the magazines dreaming of having that perfect smile, Hair and body. Looking at myself in the mirror basically all that appeared in my head was insults aimed at myself. - I know, hypocrite. - Reading one book changed my perspective, I can't remember what it was called but it explained something that has stayed on my mind for a few years. "If you keep spotting your 'down points' where is it going to get you? Somewhere where you don't think you are good enough for something probably." - For one week try this and see how you feel, it helped me. - "Look at yourself in the mirror, stop looking at the bad points on your body. Look at things that you actually like. Look at your eyes, your smile or even your curves. You are beautiful. Tell yourself that at least five times when you look in the mirror and mean it, I challenge you."
Trying that actually made me stop and look at myself. Not only on the outside but I looked at my personality, what I wanted changing and what I actually liked. One by one I felt the bricks being put back into place helping with my confidence.
I believe you can actually get somewhere, I did. You are beautiful and worth it.
~ Soph.
